an upside to freefalling

June 15, 2009

A very wise friend of ours, who is always there for everyone and is known for his ability to give a fresh, unbiased perspective on any problem, is himself somewhat of a tortured soul on occasion. He would never tell any of us the extent of it, but what is so admirable about him is that he is smart, mature, and healthy enough to know that feeling down is ok as long as you do something about it. So he’ll see a counsellor, or change something about his life he knows is not right for him, or make an effort to lighten his own load. And it helps him, I can see it.

I have so much respect for this guy, because as much as he might doubt it at times, he’s got it all together. And having it all together, in my opinion, is about acknowledging that in life, you won’t always have it all together. There are times that absolutely suck, when you feel like you’re not doing things right. So instead of feeling sorry for yourself, do something about it. It won’t fix things overnight, of course, but it will over time. And while you’re waiting, you at least have the feeling that you’ve got some control.

This friend of ours (who I hope doesn’t mind that I referenced him in our blog) was advised by a counsellor to take 20 minutes out of his day, no matter what he was doing or where he was, for self-reflection. I don’t think it mattered what he thought about, but just 20 minutes to remove himself from everything and just be… it seems important. It seems like something we should all do for ourselves.

 

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Now for me, it’s not such a priority since I’m often alone, often lost in my own thoughts. I think that’s my problem, that I should instead take 20 minutes out of every day to reflect on others. Or what I should do for them, not for myself.

The message I take from our friend’s experience is that life can be immensely challenging, but it’s not impossible. And that I should do everything I can to make my life the way I know it should be.

-Coco

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